Looking ahead

"Happy New Year! I can't believe 2019 is almost over!"

That is what I've been saying to everyone lately. I really cannot believe this year is out. When I put it into perspective, end of the year means that it's almost already one year since Momo and Noah joined our family. While at times it feels they have been with us for much longer, I also feel like they just got here. In a blink of an eye, winter turned to spring then summer to fall and now winter again and we're looking ahead to new experiences and adventures in 2020.

Many people who know me know that I don't do resolutions. For one, I've been terrible at keeping them and it's just a deflating feeling when it's not even a month into the new year you find yourself wondering where all that hype and motivation went.

But the other day when I was out walking our guest dogs I found myself in the most peculiar outfit. Pink sweatpants, a red North Face fleece jacket and my bright blue running shoes. I don't think I have been so disastrously un-color coordinated in my entire life. 

I was telling this to Yangkyu the other day and I made a vow. To actually look halfway decent (in every day starting "tomorrow" (which was actually yesterday).

You see, dog sitting means that my clothes get dirtied a lot. Often. Within seconds of taking a shower and changing my clothes. There is drool and dirt and food and sometimes a pungent smell of a dog will linger. I'm not sure when it happened but I began to revert to sweats as my go to outfit. And I have a few select ones that I began to wear on a daily basis whenever I had guest dogs with me. Somehow that began to manifest into my off-dogsitting days. Normally I was happy to finally "dress up", do my hair and make up and go out. That quickly became a hassle and I went out looking a bit frumpy. And I began to not like feeling this way.

And so yesterday, after a busy morning routine with all the dogs, I got ready. And I took out a pair of jeans and a sweater. I did my hair. I put make up on. And while I still got stains, dog food and drool on my clothes, I got through my first day of keeping my promise to go through the day looking put together.

Here's to day 2. (Edit: I'm just coming back to go over what I wrote after showering and not only do I have jeans and a "nice" shirt on, I'm even doing a facial pack this very moment. Huzzah!)

I hope I'll be able to come back some point next year and say that I'm continuing to do this.

PS - Yangkyu just walked in and saw that I was actually writing. "You're blogging?" This space has been such a hard place to come back to. I used to always have something to say or share. Now I grasp at what I want to share. Are my stories good enough? Funny enough? Relevant enough? Are my pictures good enough? Do people even care? Will people judge? I used to find moments so well and I think I got caught up with worrying over what everyone might say and trying to find perfection in words and pictures that I just gave up trying. And so I hope to also go back to where this all began - writing and sharing for the purposes of keeping a diary of our family and being thankful for anyone who wants to follow along.